Still Have Cancer…So I’m Cancer Boy

They were not able to get all the cancer so even after the surgery I’m still Cancer Boy instead of the guy formerly known as Cancer Boy.

Here’s what happened with the procedure and what’s been going in the last couple of weeks.

First after the pre op appointment on Monday they wanted to do x-rays to see if I could still have the surgery because of a cough and back pain.

The day of the surgery I went in at 11 a.m. but surgery didn’t happen until late afternoon because a previous surgery went long. I was there unable to eat or drink for nearly 24 hours since I had to start fasting the night before.

I guess if I were a woman I would not have “good birthing hips”. The doctor told the family after surgery and noted in the post op notes that I had a really small pelvic area. It meant the area to work with was made difficult because it was cramped. They made 5 incisions across my stomach to insert the robotic tools to cut away the prostate. So the surgery took longer and they also had to insert more air into my stomach to create more room for the tools to work. That meant some extreme gas pains for the next few days of recovery.

The next thing I remember was waking up in recovery and the nurse was telling me I had to take deep breathes on my own. Because of my apnea I stopped breathing every couple of minutes. After awhile I was able understand what was going on because there were alarms long off every time I woke. She explained the alarm was going off when I would stop breathing for an extended period of time. I was in pain and wanted to get out of there. Then it scared the shit out of me when I woke and the alarm was blaring and she was holding my chin and saying “I need some help over here”. I was starting to get a grasp then as she said “every time that alarm goes off it’s 30 minutes longer before you can leave post op”. I started taking deep breaths each time I would almost drift off. I told her that I understood it was like Pavlov’s Dog and I would start responding each time I heard it. So next time it went off I started barking. At first she though I was trying to say something through the mask and then she realized what I was doing and said “Good boy”

The next few days were a haze because I was in constant pain. Didn’t remember some of the stuff that I posted or some of the text messages I had.

The catheter pain was every thing I was afraid it would be. Constant tugging and just laying in the hotel bed with nurse Trina emptying the bag every hour or two. I didn’t read books, watch movies, or do anything I swore I would be able to do while I recovered. When I had my heart attack exactly three years ago I was tired all the time but did not have pain. I underestimated what this was going to be like because this was pain from the catheter and pain all across my stomach where the 5 incisions were. Nothing but pain and since some assholes decided to create the opioid epidemic they no longer hand them out like candy.

I wasn’t expecting the call from the pathologist for a few more days and I could tell from his delivery that he was starting with positive things but there was going to be a “however” to follow. The tumor took up 70 % of my prostate. It did not spread to the lymph nodes…. “however” it did escape and attach to the bladder wall,

Next step was having the catheter removed. It felt every bit as it looks in the Dumb and Dumber scene.

Now I am training to go potty all on my own like a big boy! My wife bought my some rockin diapers that look like sporty underwear. It’s going really well as I’m already learning to try and control it. The only mistake was waiting to long when we started the trip home and the pain took my to my knees in the parking lot as I got out to go. I might have done some damage so I made a vow to go every time before I think I need to.

I can’t lift over 10lbs for another 6 weeks. Do know what’s more than ten pounds? EVERYTHING. It includes not opening doors like the one at the hotel pool that was on a pressure lock or something and needs about 75 lbs of force. It was really hard watching Trina load the car with two weeks of our stuff and my moms while I stood back and couldn’t help. I can’t ride a bike or sit on a riding mower o r anything.

The next step is to heal for the next 3 months. I have to work at following all my orders to not mess up my innards so it doesn’t affect the next stage. 3 months is when I have to go back for my follow up tests and meet with the radiology team about the cancer on my bladder wall. The tests and those meetings determine when I would start radiation treatment from there.

I can’t possibly thank my friends and family enough. It’s sounds so cliche until you’re the one that has to say it and mean it.